29/11 Bob McHardy memorial Audax

Another excellent local audax event to enjoy. This one was in remembrance of well known local super audaxer Bob Mchardy whose untimely death while riding happened just over two years ago. Helping to organise the event was our very own 'Biachi Bomber' Tom Norris who said he would see us at the tea stop

The weather forecast was for very strong winds and fifty mile an hour gusts but myself, Malc C, Malc D, Patrick, Jamie,Andy T and Shirley would not be put off riding it.

Malc tries out the Defy for size!

Due to a broken wheel Malc C would have to ride my Giant Defy while I was glad to be back on my beloved Cannondale  Caad 8 fresh from the bike shop after being treated to a new gear cable and comfy bar tape.

Stepping out of our warm vehicles we were immediately  buffeted by the strong winds and their significant wind chill. Shirley is gradually building up cycle gear but having just purchased a 750 lumens light for the chain-gang her budget could not stretch to cycling tights so she was still wearing shorts (brr!)

A quick giggle before the serious stuff begins!

We set off together at 9:00 but very soon Patrick and Andy pulled away from the rest of us before myself and the two Malcs pulled away from Shirley and Jamie. Malc D is strong enough to ride with Patrick but was feeling tired after his efforts at Saturday's pre BBR/BBR and his dodgy hips were playing up so he was happy to plod round with myself and Malc C.

The initial part of the route had some undulating terrain and it was on one of these hills that we stopped to tighten up Malc D's gear shifter.  This gave Shirley the chance to catch up with us, I told her not to stop , we would soon catch her up, or so I thought.

After sorting out the shifter we moved onto a long descent. Malc C got a bit carried away and despite not having a map or GPS he led the charge, completely oblivious to the right hand turn we were supposed to make. I tried to catch him up to tell him to take the next one instead but he was too far ahead and missed that one as well. Eventually he heard our frantic cries and we cycled back up to the second turn. Unfortunately this is where I suffered our one and only puncture. Now it was Jamie's turn to catch us up and just like Shirley we urged him to keep riding and we would attempt to catch him up.

Heading generally west/south west meant we were heading into a very strong head winds for mile after mile. This didn't bother me at all but our average speed was taking a severe knock. After what seemed like hours we had only ridden thirty miles and were less than half the way round. Heading through Uckfield we had yet another delay when I stupidly changed down the gears while in the big ring causing a complete chain jam. Loosing the rear wheel in the frame was the only way to free it (thanks Malc)

The gps route had made navigation a breeze until we turned right down what felt like someone's private drive. We had to keep close to the left as a number of very expensive cars came past us in the opposite direction . When the road finished with a cluster of nice
looking houses we knew something was wrong . While wandering what to do next a small group of friendly lady cyclists plus Jamie turned up equally confused. Using our collective garmins we tried another lane but a local dog walker grumpily informed us this was also a dead end. There was nothing for it but to go back to the main road and 'shock horror' use our common sense to navigate to  Wivelsfield . We though our new friends would ride with us for a while but they must have gone off and tried yet another lane as they failed to reappear back onto the main road. Malc D is famous for his inbuilt sense of direction but he must have been feeling really tired as he asked me to try to work it out with my garmin. Zooming out I could see that if we headed south west we would eventually be back on route and sure enough after a quick blast on the main road we were back on route.

Malc's frame could be a right off?

An enjoyable steady descent taking us into the village of Ditchling was interrupted when Malc D said something had gone wrong with his front dérailleur . Unfortunately one of the bracket rivets had pulled out of the carbon frame . Malc would now have no choice but to ride on inner chainring for the rest of the route. More serious is the fact that this may not be repairable so Malc's beloved early carbon TCR far, may be a right off!

We knew that the organisers had prepared a tea and cake stop for us somewhere near Clayton. Looking ahead I could see Clayton windmill looming far above us  and hoped that we would not have to ride up to the windmill itself. Fortunately the stop was at the 'natural cemetery' just outside Ditchling. It was disappointing not to see the familiar figure of the B.Bomber but I soon forgot about Tom after munching some marzipan stollen cake and drinking several cups of fresh tea.

the two Malcs prepare to leave the 'natural' cemetery!

leaving the cemetery we were now heading east and so would enjoy the strong westerly wind at our backs for the rest of the ride. The remaining 25 miles were fantastic fun as we first traversed some lovely little lanes around Clayton before heading out on B roads towards Lewes and beyond where we were bowled along at 20+ miles with very little effort except for Malc D who had to keep his little legs spinning frantically in his inner chainring.

We arrived at HQ about ten minutes after Shirley who had ridden brilliantly with an average speed only 1 mph less than ours. Patrick and Andy T were long gone. they had come in before any other riders and used the tail wind to blow themselves all the way back to Hastings.

Many thanks to Tom and the other organisers for a great event. The next available audax is the much harder 'Hills and Mills' http://www.aukweb.net/events/detail/16-77/


Steve C

Saturday Pre-BBR to Beachy and BBR (Pevensey Bay deviation)

If you see these men, please do not approach them - they could be dangerous

In the absence of the illustrious Peter Thingy, I took it upon myself to organise the pre-BBR ride. The appropriate contact numbers came to me from Peter in his wintering grounds in the south of France (he's like a migratory goose - fat from the lush grass of England, ready to be shot and roasted for Christmas Day). The challenge to the hardy Saturday morning crew was to tackle 'Beachy', before racing the wind back to Di Paulos to meet the regular Bacon Butty Run folk at 09:30.

Five of us rolled out from Normans Bay at about 07:50: Adam, Matt S, Joe L, Steve Ferguson and me. It was cold - my garden weather station reported a temperature of just 0.3 degrees - but there was some sunshine to warm us, when the wind wasn't blowing. But, yes, it was cold alright. Joe and I set a rather fast pace to generate some heat. Gasps, groans and cries of 'have mercy' came from the riders behind, especially those with DOMS (Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness, don't you know) from their recent Mallorca exploits. We eased of a little and a decent rotation began. Joe noted my one superstition, that of saluting magpies; better safe than sorry, I say.

Our reward for climbing into the wind was a fantastic view of Eastbourne and beyond, in winter sun'.

The sun grew brighter and the morning became increasingly pleasant, if not that much warmer. The knowledge of what the weather was to become was foremost in our minds as we toiled our way past St Bedes and hauled up Upper Dukes Drive - 'let's make the most of this dry and sunny weather'! The road is at least in the lee of the hill, so we were sheltered from the worst of the wind and cold, turning into the full force of the chilly breeze as we turned steeply towards the Beachy Head Inn. The 'Cannonball' was rolling very nicely on its semi-slick cyclocross wheels and tyres, but not very rapidly, the extra weight requiring noticeably more effort to spin up the hills that my lighter 'chain gang and TT' wheels require.

Somehow, I'm not bothered by this. The effort of the ride is the same or greater as on a lighter bike, but frankly the ride quality is more satisfying. My Strava-addled brain is confused by this; surely, every ride must have a PR? Well, there's a time for speed and a time for training, and I am really enjoying working hard on the bike in more comfort than I have done for some years. I am not yet letting go of my time trial or Strava ambitions, just enjoying a different kind of riding for most of my winter rides. It feels good.

And where have you been Malc -what time do you call this..?

We reconvened in the car park at the top of the hill, catching our breath and refuelling before the fast descent into Eastbourne. Out of nowhere appeared Malc D, like the shop owner in Mr Benn. I politely enquired whither he had been, these past times. He had been late for the start of the ride, so had ridden through Eastbourne to shelter from the wind and catch us up. Chapeau Malc, canny riding!

Our ride through Eastbourne and across the marshes to Bexhill was wind-powered, but not excessively so, the stronger winds due later that day. Nevertheless, we made good time to the cafe, arriving to find Colonel Parker locking his bike to the railings and a couple of other riders huddled inside for warmth. Steve and I discussed the pronunciation of 'latte' with the chief Di Paulos' Barista. Steve was keen on saying 'latte' to rhyme with 'fartay'; the Barista corrected this to 'latte' to rhyme with 'flatay'. Steve began to argue the toss; I reminded Steve that this guy knows his business and doesn't turn up on a wiring job to tell him how to do a plug. Steve looked confused, spluttering 'Plugs! I don't wire plugs, matey!' Well, that was me told.

At this point, we bade farewell to Steve, Matt, Joe and Adam (all heading off to family commitments of some sort), and said hello to The Colonel, Fabien, Finlay and Kerry. Malc D and I remained the stalwarts from the earlier ride, but it was Finlay who set the early pace along Bexhill sea front and to Little Common. The head wind was tough going for him and Fabien, but they come into their own on the hills or when the wind drops. We hacked onward through Whydown to the turn at Tanyards Fruit Farm, rolling at a reasonable pace to Kiln Lane, before riding down the semi-offroad track that leads to The Lamb and Wartling.

Now, this is really why I'd kept the cyclocross tyres on! I reckoned they would give a more comfortable and secure ride on the fast, rough descent to Horsebridge, and so it proved. The cantilever brakes ease on smoothly, rather than grabbing, and the forks and frame absorb the bumps and humps effectively, keeping the wheels in contact with the road more. I felt all 'rufty-tufty' as I rode down the hill, out of the saddle and ducking under the brambles.

The road was flooded in places and the potholes are already worsening, after not that much rain. But the short stretch from the bridge to the foot of Jacob's Ladder was glorious, with shelter from the worst of the wind and sunshine filtering through the branches. I disturbed a flock of Redwings and raced them along the lane, and then saw three Jays scatter from the bushes to the right. I've never seen more than two in one place before, so this struck me as very unusual.

We drew breath in the car park of The Lamb, as is traditional. Col Parker revised the route away from Chilley Farm towards the delights of Pevensey Bay, via Westham. Malc and I were to head on and regroup at the turn after Lime Cross Nursery, but Finlay and Fabien were not far behind us at The Bull, so we waited for them so they did not have to ride alone on the main road. We put them in front of us and bashed on into the wind, the boys making a strong effort up the two bumps on this section and in quite tough conditions.

The stretch of road from Cricketing Green to Rickney Marsh Farm has (mostly) been resurfaced, and not before time. Gone is the "Crack of Doom' into which Peter and other riders have fallen in recent months, and gone also are numerous other chasms and clefts. The tarmac is now relatively smooth, although (sorry to be picky) I did think the edges of the road looked irregular, and that could lead to accelerated wear in bad weather. Not that I am moaning!

Malc and I again rode with the boys, putting them on the front when we reached the main road to Pevensey, giving them some encouragement to ride at pace, now they had the wind behind them. Mistake. Their young legs span faster than ours and they sprinted off, with the two of us trying to accelerate to catch them. We were halfway to Pevensey before we did; we gave them a lecture about respecting their elders whilst we waited at the traffic lights (and secretly admired their abilities).

We reached the packed cafe at Pevensey about 30 minutes later than if we'd ridden to Chilley Farm. We grabbed the only remaining table and were served quickly, I thought, as I scoffed a fruit scone to repel a bad dose of the 'sugar shakes'. It made a pleasant change to vary the route a little. The Pevensey option is also a warmer one, with indoor as well as outdoor seating.

The BBR remains a great introductory ride for new riders, with a mix of just about every sort of condition you might expect during a local rider (or even sportives further-afield), but at a gentler pace and with lots of advice and support (if you want it). If you want to go faster, you can - there is often a rider or two who will keep you company if you want to push yourself. But this is a social ride, with a cafe at the start and the end in which to chat with other riders, share experience and perhaps arrange rides of your own. The pre-BBR is usually more challenging, taking in Beachy head or a flatter but faster route around the marshes (and on 20th December, a ride to Brighton).

I headed off early, but I was not finished riding for the day. I had hoped to take daughter no.4 on the BBR, as she is keen to take up cycling, but she wanted first to get to grips with drop-bars and combined levers. By the time we got out the house, it was getting dark and the wind was blowing hard. I was not sure it was a good idea, but daughter no.4 was keen to get out on the bike (an Ebay bargain). I led her out on the first leg, into the blustery wind and patchy rain. She hung on gamely, but like the lads in the morning, her light weight made progress difficult.

I hauled her along Herbrand Walk (cruel father!) to Normans Bay, as the rain increased and the wind gusted more strongly. 'If you can ride along Herbrand in these conditions, you can ride anywhere locally', I told her in an encouraging tone. 'Yeah' was the laconic response. 'Now we have the pleasure of being blown home - you're going to enjoy this'! No comment.

Then, just like the boys on the morning ride, she pelted off at high speed, with me hanging on her back wheel. Very impressive leg speed - wow! I think my knees and ankles would fly off at that cadence, or suddenly jam solid and explode. Her speed peaked at about 42kph (26mph), albeit with a gale pushing her along, but she loved the feeling of going fast on a bike. Somehow, the experience has not put her off riding and I hope to get her on a BBR before Christmas.

Safe riding, Neil

Wednesday Chain Gang - Cannonball Ride

 We've had the rain, we've had the wind, and we've had the rain and the wind. Last night it was the turn of the cold, thankfully without the company of any other unpleasant weather condition, or so we thought! Whilst putting on my usual chain gang gear, I noticed the temperature had dropped from 9 degrees at 14:00 to 2.8 degrees at 19:00. At that rate, it would be -2 degrees by midnight! I took off my kit and put on my long bib tights, dug out my neoprene overshoes and a thicker undershirt.

Keri back to riding after Illness!

There were 17 riders ready to 'lay down some rubber' last night - a good turnout, I thought. We were in a chatty mood and before we knew it, it was time for the off, riding out as one group. The chat on my arrival had been about my new 'steed'. Lord Buckland was not impressed, feigning injury when he tried to lift it. Huh! The most excellent Stuart Hodd commented that it didn't so much ride over bumps in the road as flatten them, christening my new pride and joy 'the Cannonball'. I much prefer that to 'Sparkles', the name my daughters want to use, but I'm not sure the bike is THAT heavy at 9.3kg.

Rare appearance from Konrad!

The pace was reasonable as we started to rotate along Bexhill front, having continued a fair amount of chat and banter as we warmed up. Hauling the Cannonball up South Cliff, I realised that even small amounts of extra weight require extra effort. I resolved to lose the weight difference between my Giant racer and the Cannonball from my belly; so that's about 1.5kg to find. I'll make a pledge, here and now, to lose 3kg, I'm just not sure by when. I'm 12st 6lbs now, so I need to get below 12st, if you'll forgive me mixing my metrics.

Having dropped back slightly on the slope, I caught the group up on the descent, staying with them along Cooden. There were perhaps 10 of us at this stage, the others having dropped back into smaller groups. It was cold, but not unpleasant, as we rolled first right at the Cooden Hotel and then left onto Herbrand Walk. But what was this? The road was wet - not just a bit damp, but bloody soaking. We were soon showered in spray from the bikes around us, as we rode on rather bemused at the amount of water that had come, as if from nowhere (Steve 'Gadget' Ferguson later confirmed, via his bar-mounted weather station, that the water had fallen as rain from the sky. Thanks Steve).

I was feeling a pleased with myself at this stage, as I was hanging on with the ultras and feeling reasonably comfortable with the pace. Regular readers will know though that, at this point, the spectre of Spooky Hill looms large... We rattled onward through the twisty section of lane before the Star Inn, jinking left and right over the narrow bridge and racing on towards Normans Bay. I prepared myself mentally for the challenge I knew lay ahead, making sure that, for once, I avoided being at the front of the group as we hit the hill.

This part of the plan went well. I was riding down the outside behind Steve Butcher (I think), who waved riders around him. I found I had it in my legs to make the leap, so I got out of the saddle, rode around him and kept up with the group - well, mostly. I found myself just 10m off, but made it back as we whizzed down the west slope. We swept right at the base, pelting towards the tight left-hander in a fairly loose group. It was my turn to take the front, and this time it was that bit harder to get down the outside and keep the pace up. That effort cooked me and I was eventually dropped about 1km from the roundabout. I do not think the front group was as fast as usual, or as smooth, as the less strong riders slowed things after getting to the front. But I for one learnt a bit more about riding at pace in a tight group and I really enjoyed the outward leg.

The steam rises at the Pevensey turnaround!

We arrived at the roundabout in dribs and drabs, before turning back to Bexhill at a higher pace, with the light wind behind us. I managed another couple of turns on the front before going into reverse on the west side of Spooky. I was happy enough with that - the Cannonball has proved itself a strong pedalling platform that is no slower on the flat than my Giant TCR, but it is clearly a bit heavy on the hills. I guess that is what you want from a winter or training bike. I'll shut up about the bike now (probably).

I rode on, rolling in a heavy, cast-iron way (like a, well, cannonball, I suppose) across Herbrand Walk, aware that there were bright lights behind me, most probably from other riders. I was eventually caught on Cooden Drive by Malc D and Simon G, both pulling strongly. I managed to tag on and we pressed on to the lights, rotating a few times along the way, Simon putting on a spurt to arrive before me and Malc.

I rode back to the Pevensey roundabout with Mike Howard and Steve Gadget, having dropped Lord Buckland with his butler at Cooden ('m'lud looks rather warm - shall I bring you a chilled serving girl?'). Peter Van (you remember, that bloke from Normans Bay with blond hair, or was it brown..?) no longer requires an escort home as his Matron has whisked him away to France for some winter sun and therapeutic enemas.

My second ride to Bexhill on the night was in the company of 'The Gadget', me having persuaded him to do a double-ration of the chain gang to get some more miles under his gadget belt. Well now, wouldn't you know it - just as we reached the top of Spooky, his front light suddenly went out - poof! We pulled over by Rock Cottage.

"I might have a spare light in the back", Steve said.

He opened up the gadget bag that hangs heavy from the back of his saddle, like a large pair of ram's bollocks. He unzipped the rear flap to reveal a treasure trove of equipment, enough to service a small family car, with little worker-elves hiding in the corners, a blacksmith's forge at the back (that explains the smoke), a range of zip ties, a hammer and some nails, a cuddly toy, a fondu set, some suitcases... But no front light.

"What are you going to do Steve?" I asked.

"I'm going to borrow your light" said Steve, an air of menace in his voice.

I handed over my spare (note that Steve, a *spare* front light) and we rode on. The moon was bright and I did my usual trick of turning off my front light along Herbrand and riding by its silvery shine.

"What are you doing?!?" said Steve, more than a hint of panic in his voice.

"Travelling by moonlight, matey, it's all the rage".

A car promptly spoilt my fun and we rode on, thinking now about food, hot baths and dry clothes. A night of damn fine chain-ganging had been had by all. See you all next week, unless I see you at 07:45 on Saturday, at Normans Bay, for the pre-BBR ride to Beachy Head.

Safe riding, Neil

Mallorcan Velo Professional (MVP) Club

Let’s put is this way – it started well!

Everybody picked up by the minibus Patrick had organised. Each stop an excited face boarded and we were off. That was until we got to Buckland Manor, by the time we had driven through the ornate gates, up the gravel road, passed the deer park and Stewarts butler had loaded his matching Louise Vuitton luggage, we were getting a bit pushed for time. The first navigational error ‘that anybody could have made’ we missed the Easyjet check in. Why don’t they make themselves more visible – perhaps a garish colour? Note to self – email Stelios.

Made it through all the security although my hips sent all the alarms off. Still no harm done and the latex gloves weren’t that bad. Got to the gate only to be confronted by stroppy woman not allowing Malc C on with his Dolce & Cabbanna handbag. Anyway after firmly putting her in her place – he meekly put it in his wheelie cabin bag and spread his contraband amongst us and ate four bananas. Arrived in Palma airport, all bags off and then the amusing Majorcan pastime of hide and seek with the transfer driver being ‘it’. Patrick & I won the match finding the cheeky monkey hiding behind a rubbish bin having a smoke with a tiny piece of paper with my name written in feint biro. The journey to the accommodation was uneventful and nobody noticed my anxiety increasing by the mile muttering ‘well what can they expect for £13 a night’ – anyway it was ok! We had a whole apartment block to ourselves with two adjacent rooms on the top floor – Patrick, Nigel, brother in law Tom & I in one and Lord Buckland and his staff Mat, Malc C & Duncan in the other.

Scouted the place and had a couple of beers on the seafront first night. Eventually found the supermarket and bought loads of crisps. We then thought we would have a few beers, meal (with beers) and bed.  Malc C volunteered to be kitty keeper (more of this later).

First day
Collect bikes and complained a bit. Then straight off for Cap Formentor – fantastic ride 27.5 miles 3000ft climbing. Out to a lighthouse with a café – although the freezing temp of 23 degrees had the locals in their duffle coats and scarves. On the way back my chain snapped. Eventually Stewart decided to come back and rescue the situation with chain tool and quick link. He was all smug until I reminded him that it was the quick link I lent him three months ago. Quick lunch and then off to the flesh pots of Can Picafort for a Burger King and tattoos all round. 23 miles 300ft. Evening of hushed tones as the reality of the torture Nigel had planned for us the following day began to sink in. Stew and Mat decided to berate Juan the bike man for not putting a 40 ring on the back cassette along with stabilisers. Fewer beers consumed. Although enjoyed a good evening of slagging off everybody who didn’t come on the trip (be warned).

Second day
Up at crack of dawn. Nigel spooks us all by packing loads of Jelly Babies and 4 gallons of water. People start thinking my brother in law Tom had the right idea of feigning exhaustion and staying at home. Met by transport taking us to farthest point of the island. Bikes in the trailer – us in the leather seats team bus delusions of grandeur and talk of Castelli team kit ensued.
Arrived in Andraxt and spurred on by Garmin working & Duncan & I both agreeing on the route, five of us set off at a pace to Palma, whilst Patrick and Nigel wanted to go on the correct route. Eventually regrouped and oh how we laughed – at least it was an easy day coming up!

The route back was along the north coast through the Tramuntana mountain range 75 miles and 8,170ft of climbing. Amazing route through windy mountain roads and orange sun drenched ancient villages perched on cliff tops looking out to sea. We split into natural groups (Nigel & everybody else).

Passed some amazing places for coffee, which clearly were not good enough for us and settled for lunch at Soller at a pretty quayside restaurant that gave a fantastic view of the hurricane blowing outside. Quick calculations and we realized it would be dark before we got back. I impressed the group with my Spanish, uttering ‘la cuenta por favor’. To which Patrick helpfully added ‘and can we have the bill love’.

Right out of Soller started the epic Puig Major climb. More red spots on strava than a polka dot jersey. Put it this way JV would have loved it. Nuff said. Got to top and Nigel lied and said it was all down hill to home. On the way back Malc C broke a spoke & developed a wobbly front brake and was ably assisted by Mat in exchange for lighting up his pitch back mountain ascent back to base. Meanwhile Stewart got blown off his bike by 55mph winds (he was right about the stabilizers).

Well earned evening of beer wine, port and Lemoncello under pretense of celebrating Duncan’s 60th birthday. Also formed the Mallorcan Velo Professional (MVP) Club, decided on constitution and elected Duncan as grand master and when he dies Malc C will take over (and having Castelli kit). Went for an Indian but soon left as we were affronted at a noisier party of people than us. The MVP just can’t stand losing (except the beer kitty – which we did loose).

Third day
Bit worse for wear. Split into two groups. Nigel, Duncan Patrick and I in the Intensive Cardiac Ward group and Stewart, Tom, Duncan & Malc C in the Burger King and tattoos group. Group one spent the day on a 50 odd mile with no elevation just trying to stop Patrick having a heart attack. Group two just had a great time doing a 40 mile pootle less elevation with coffee.

Back to the airport and Malc C noticed he had left his phone in apartment transfer man helpfully turned around and phone retrieved. Malc then caught up with his Candy Crush.

Got to airport noticed wanted posters with Pete Buss’s picture on them.

Back home and slept ‘hasta la próxima vez’.

Peter Baker

20/11 HSLCC Fri Night Ride - Winter Begins Plus Giant defy 3 Review!

Zack and Nick Join the Friday Night riders!

HSLCC Friday Night Ride 

Cold but dry weather brought out a good turnout of nine riders for the Friday night ride. Joining us for the first time were father and son, Nick and Zack Fawcett.

We have moved our departure time from 7:35 to 7;30 , so at 7;28 myself and Steve B (on a fixie) set off two minutes before the others to ensure a safe descent. Unfortunately on the way down my leyzanne pump worked its way loose from the bracket and started to hit the chain ring.  Pulling over to the side I had to time to turn round and admire the sight of the other riders streaming down Battery Hill with their pure white lights lighting up the road.

On the way through the reserve Andy T's front wheel puncturesd when it  struck one of the
many pebbles that litter the path. I shouted out to the others but they were too far ahead to hear me. It was a good job that I had been behind Andy as he had forgotten to pack his levers so he would have been stuck out there. Andy is another rider who has discovered the benefits of CO2 cylinders so soon had the puncture sorted while I set off to tell the others who were waiting at the public conveniences.

We were all back together for the Broad-oak drag but almost immediately became spread out into different ability groups. For a while I rode with Nick and Steve B but despite being on a high geared fixie Steve had enough strength to eventually drop us but not before we had wheeled in Andy , who was a little off form not have ridden for about a month. About half way up the climb Nick started to fade a little and was dropped by myself and the off form Andy who were an equal match all the way to the top.

Success on Stonestile for Zack and Nick !

I had several comments from the others on how well I was riding. Rather than put this down to my fitness I think it was more due to being back on my now sorted Giant defy ( mini review below) . The frame is not as smooth as my CAAD 8 but the bike is lighter and a bit stiffer so has an advantage on the climbs!

Reaching the 'cut through to Doleham lane' , I was struck by how cold it was. Dan checked his garmin and informed me it was only 1.5 degrees C, so no wonder! My chest felt cold from breathing in all the crisp air but my hands still felt warm despite wearing fingerless gloves.

With the Westfield road still closed to traffic , we enjoyed another blast down the 'etape style' closed lane with Malc leading the charge. Sweeping into the Stonestile approach  I nearly over cooked it, forgetting the Defy doesn't handle quite as well as the CAAD 8. This was Nick and Zack's first time Fri night ascent of Stonestile , Zack found it easy while Nick found it more of a struggle but did well to complete it first time.





Giant Defy Mini Review

Giant Defy 3 returns safely from the 'Friday Night Ride'!

I bought my giant defy 3 a year ago. At this time of the year you can buy a Defy 3 brand new for just £400 . I had previously had one of the first generation Defys and really enjoyed the ride position but found the rear end far to flexible due to the position of the rear seat stays joining the seat tube well down the frame. When the frame cracked it gave me the prefect excuse to get one of the newer models with  the stiffer back end.
 On my first long ride I found the 2014 bike was  too long and it gave me back ache. This was strange as it was the same size frame as my old one . It turned out to be the incredibility long ramps on the handlebars.It was only when I changed the stem from the 100mm stock to a 70mm one that the back ache stopped.
The head tube on the med/large defy is 18.5 cm , I found this a bit too high but there are plenty of  spacers under the stem that can be removed to drop the height to a slightly more racy position. the tall head tube is great for the older rider to avoid stiff back and shoulders.
 The seat post is one of those ratchet types where there are a set number of positions, after much anguish I couldn't find the right angle, it was either pointing too far up or too far down, this was solved by use of a ritchie dual bolt set post with an infinite number of positions.
The bike came with the brand new 9 speed Sora group set. The shifters are a copy of the old style 9 speed Tiagra shifters and worked well . Not so good were the rear and front dérailleurs which gave  clunky gear changes . The front one was particularly nasty and would constantly go out of true, even the bike shop couldn't get it sorted so these were junked and replaced with some  new 10 speed Tiagra ones which are far better quality.
Wheels on mid range giant bikes used to be notoriously bad but the ones fitted to the Defy 3 are actually OK. Weight is reasonable and I have only managed to break one spoke so far. The hubs are not the best though as they don't spin as freely as shimano hubs.
The overall weight of the bike is impressive for such a low price. The front forks are straight and come into their own when out of the saddle. The frame is a good compromise between stiffness and comfort. Handling is very stable downhill but the high front end does limit handling when sweeping around bends. With the  higher position of the seat stays the annoying 'bounce' of the original defy has long gone.
Best feature of all are the rack mounts front and back so this makes the bike a capable tourer as well as a club bike.
Unfortunately in 2015 giant have gone back to the idea of seat stays joining the seat tube low down to give a more comfortable leaf spring ride, but to me this just means that the rear end will be over springy, so I cannot recommend these, also they have gone over to their own unique seat tubes so you are stuck with giants own brand seat post. The 2015 Giant Defy 3 avoids these problems by being exactly the same as the 2014 but then you have to put up with sora dérailleurs.
If you want a giant Defy I would recommend buying a used 2014 defy 0,1 or 2 second hand but bear in mind that there are no rack mounts on defy 0 or1, So overall I would opt for a second hand defy 2014 Defy 2 or buy a brand new 2015 defy 3 but be prepared to replace the dérailleurs for Tiagra ones (Only cost about £50)

Steve C

Part Deux - Wednesday Chain Gang (+BBR and Pre BBR)

"My heart 'skipped' a beat when I first set eyes on you"

Last Saturday 18:11

(direct text transcript)

Neil "Hi Chum, how was the BBR?"

Neil "So anyway, we went to Eastbourne. Had a nice time and then it happened"

Neil "I'm not even sure how, but one minute we are looking at home furnishings, and the next....."

Neil "It sparkles, does yours?"

Me: "Sorry (for delay in responding) , been busy, down the pub now waiting for take away (using the vouchers sent by Xi Jinping as an apology for bike light.) BBR was totally awful.  What have you bought?"

Neil: "We were just passing by a skip and I spotted her and just knew I had to have her"

Me: "Great, what did you get?"

Neil: "It's a Raleigh Riva Ladies Sportive Special"

Me: "So what, you just helped yourself then?"

Neil: "Of course not - I'm not a skip bandit - I put £5 through the letter box.  I've sent you a picture"

The attachment came through.

"Oh, thank you God!"

Earlier that day....

Pre BBR and Solo BBR

I met up with Adam at 07:45 as usual and we had a very sociable run up to Beachy and then back to De Paulos.  We were just in the process of congratulating ourselves on the fact that the rain had held off when we were suddenly overtaken by a road cyclist wearing jeans, trainers  and a large rucksack just as we were 'speeding' along Walls End Road.  This caused us much embarrassment and took us some time to come to terms with:

"He was wearing jeans, for God's sake!", I protested

"Yes, I know, mind you he probably hasn't just been up Beachy!", said Adam in an effort to console me.

"Yes, quite right!"

Back at DPs I was amazed to see that the only person who had showed up was Mal C and he was in 'civvies'.  As pleased as I was to see him I was disappointed that I faced the prospect of a solo BBR (which has not happened to me since the early days of joining the club.)  We had coffee and and chat and I decided I might as well go home as it had started to rain quite heavily.

As I approached Normans Bay I started to feel 'up' and thought I may as well just do it on my own - the worst decision since 'The Charge of The Light Brigade."

All was bearable until the road through Herstmonceaux, where because of the volume of rain the gulleys at the side of the road were full which meant I had to cycle a few feet away from kerb. This caused much anger among motorists; additionally the spray from the cars was intense, making me feel very shaky and vulnerable.  At the post office I 'admitted defeat', dismounted and cowered in a bus shelter.  Unfortunately the rain showed no sign of slowing down so I had no choice but to press on.  The left turn after the Garden Center gave me some relief as at least I was off the main 'drag' - however, this was to be short lived - I was about to enter the 'Gates of Hell'

At the junction by Flowers Green there was a sign saying 'Road Closed' - which obviously I ignored. It was there for a reason. About two hundred meters later I met two giant tarmac stripping diggers in full flow.  I offered a smile and a 'thumbs up' which seemed to work.  The first digger let me pass and 'tooted' his mate to do the same.  I'm not sure if I imaged it or if they were smirking - either way they must have thought: "What a t*sser". Straight away I met with the 'fruits' of their labour in the shape of two miles of unmade road covered in clinker!.
Oh, the pain!.  It was unbearable, I thought if I don't get a puncture on my wafer thin Schwalbe 'Ones' it will be a miracle.  On top of this the rain was now sheeting down, unrelenting and accompanied by a chilled wind.  I, of course, was hopelessly under-dressed: thin club top and thin pack-able jacket . Eventually I made it back on to the untouched original surface - Oh, the relief!.

Arriving at Chilley Farm I could barely speak, I was so cold and almost delirious.

"Americ c c c c ano, p p p lease and a b b b bacon bap"

The nice lady who normally serves us seemed very concerned:

"Why don't you go and sit round the fire?"

Just for a moment I thought she must be taking the p*ss, but, no, it is true there is now a wood burning stove.
Upon seeing it I almost mounted it like a randy toad.  Two kindly ladies saw my situation and seemed in awe of my stupidity.

"Have you done many miles today?"

"Oh, about 50", I replied, sheepishly.

"What in this weather?, don't you normally cycle with others then?"

"Yes, but they've all got brains."

With my blood now circulating but with a singed knob, I looked out enthusiastically at the 'stair rods' of rain.  I decided that I might as well grab the brownie points on offer and go and get Vicki's doughnut.  I sloshed into the Pevensey Bakers.

"Usual is it - two lemon doughnuts?", said the nice young girl.

"Yes, please".  It was all I could manage; I was still a bit delirious.

Arriving home, I walked into the hallway on stumps, as I couldn't feel my feet, stripped off all my soggy gear and headed for the shower.  I turned on the shower with stumps (as I couldn't feel my hands either), leaned my hands against the tiles and turned my face upwards into the torrent of hot water.

Neil's new dream machine!

"Nice ride was it sweetie?", said Vicki as she saw me leaving the shower room.

"Yes, not bad at all, thank you"

Wednesday Chain Gang

....it even has a dynamo!

I was quite surprised by the turnout tonight, bearing in mind the awful conditions.

Neil was there, of course, showing off his new Raleigh, and it was really quite heartwarming that nobody took the p@ss; and people were even polite enough to ignore 'the elephant in the room' that it was a girl's bike.

I was very pleased to see Steve 'Gadget' F, who was complaining about his bad back, brought on he thinks, through playing 'bubble football'.  Has the world gone mad? it used to be just 11 a side or 5 a side football, now we have 'walking football' (for old people) and 'bubble football' (for psychos - according to Steve.)  Anyway, we agreed that we would stick together and make the best of the evil headwind.  We were going quite well until we had to stop at the De La Warr roundabout  to wait for a car, which didn't bother indicating, while everyone else slipped through.  It was downhill all the way after that we had not a hope of hanging on to the coat tails of the rest of the group.  In a funny kind of way this was quite liberating as the pressure was now off.  We toughed it out, taking turns on the front and grunting and cursing all the way to the roundabout.  the cruelest 'cut' of the Chang Gang is that those that need the least rest get the most and vice versa.

"Are we all here now?", asked Simon

"No, a couple more to come yet?", I said.

This was an outrageous lie, but it bought us a little more time.

The return leg was delightful requiring very little peddling to well exceed 20 MPH.  Steve let me do all the 'work', but this really wasn't much at all so I didn't mind.

The ride back to Normans Bay was just me and 'grumpy b*ll*cks' aka Neil.  It's got to the point where I'm afraid to say anything because it's like riding with a bad tempered wasp.

Despite this Neil and I always enjoy our game of 'who can be the most insulting'.

"Turd", said Neil

"Peanut in a turd", I replied  (a particular favourite exchange of ours.)

Back at the border crossing.

"I'm leaving for France on Wednesday, I'm going for seven weeks, with a ten day U.K break in the middle", I said

"We would all of forgotten all about you by then", he said without compassion.

"Oh, well, who gives a sh*t", I said pretending I wasn't hurt.

With friends like that who needs enemies.

Only joking Neil - 'man hugs'- what is a cycle ride without a bit of banter.

Peter Buss

P.S Next Part Deux will be from France.

Wednesday Chain Gang - Daft Dozen do Storm Barney

"How does she ride?"
"Smooth as silk; soft, firm and bouncy in the right places."
"Worth the money?"
"And some - recommended."
"Will you upgrade her?"
"Nah, she looks good in her winter boots, but when I want to go hard and fast, I'll take them off."

Peter looked impressed with my account of my new steed, a Cannondale CAADX, bought at a great price at Tri Store in Eastbourne. The 'winter boots' refers to the wheel and tyre package the bike came with - 32 spoke wheels with 35mm rubber, weighing 3.8kg. They provide a very comfy ride but, as you can imagine, not a very fast or responsive one. I swapped in a pair of Giant PSL-1 wheels wearing Conti 4 Season tyres, taking a kilo off the weight and making the bike that bit faster for the chain gang. The surprise though was the ride - it lost the squishy feel that the 'Sammy Slicks' provided, but I realised that a lot of the 'suspension' comes from the fork and frame. They are a superb combination, almost as smooth as a Trek Domane with the Iso-whatsit bendy bit in the frame.

This week's chain gang was windier than last week's, and that is saying something. Twelve daft buggers turned up and rolled off as one group at 19:27, led from the front by Stuart 'Mega-Power' Hodd and Michael 'Mad Max' Maxwell. Tucked in behind were me and Barney, then the other eight riders. We gave those at the front some encouragement:

"Ok, we've warm now, you can speed up."
"What's the hold up?"
"Are you unwell Michael?"
"You do the outward leg and we'll do the return - it's only fair."

I don't recall their response, other than an earlier-than-usual command from 'El Capitan' Hodd to rotate the lead.

Oh Lordy. The wind was vicious, but it was at least a constant blast, rather than a series of hard gusts that can catch you unawares. Going down the outside was tough work, especially when riding with the faster guys. I think six or seven of the better riders pulled away on South Cliff, their superior power carrying forward that bit quicker.

I fell into a trio with John V and Steve B, each of us fighting to take a turn at the front. Steve was working very hard on his fixie, panting and getting out of the saddle to take the lead. John and he pulled away from me on Herbrand, John not easing as I would have liked when on the front, but no doubt he thought I wasn't not putting in a hard enough shift. Kindly, he and Steve eased off after the level crossing, allowing me to catch them before the stretch to the Star Inn. I lasted as far as (you've guessed it) Spooky Hill, where they left me again and rightly rode on. I'd been given my chance and they were fairing better in the conditions than me.

I had a solo ride from the crest of the hill to the roundabout. I've ridden in worse conditions - it was at least warm and dry last night - but it's never much fun beating a path into the dark and wind on your own. John, Steve and I all encountered the same half-wit driver, driving in the middle of the road with a blinding array of spotlights. I think the driver saw me, but I'm not sure! I presume they are a frustrated Paris-Dakar wannabe.

We waited for the remaining riders to arrive, giving them 20 seconds or so to catch their breath, before pulling out into the stream of wind that would power us home. And what power - it was like stepping into a fast-running river! I bagged a couple of nice PRs around Spooky, but Barney showed us his awesome power on the west to east slope. I was at the front as the group went around the wet, puddly area at the base. I thought I was doing quite well, but then Barney went storming by, out of the saddle, having turned on the turbo boost. He was up that slope like a whippet after a rabbit - a blur of legs and flapping ears. Zzzziiiipppp and gone, with Stuart and then the other Ultras whizzing by in his wake. A sonic boom echoed over the marshes and I cried out 'bastards' in mock hatred.

For the second time last night, I was humbled by some gentlemanly conduct. Alex Smith eased off enough at the top to let me back on, shouting encouragement. I pushed as hard as I could and just about caught his wheel before we pelted down the slope towards the level crossing, but I was never fully attached and Alex banked around the bend some 10 metres ahead of me. I was spinning the pedals as fast as I could, but I lacked the power to push a higher gear and the faster group pulled away. I eased to a pace I could maintain for the rest of the ride, revelling in the extra power the wind gave me. Must-have-more-power... Argh!

It was great fun, even if I was again riding solo. I turned after the level crossing and felt the wind push me on with urgent haste, up the slight slope by the first huts, before the flat stretch by the shingle. A commuter was riding unbelievably slowly, hugging the chainlink fence - I blew past him at high speed and was gone before he could say 'what the..?' The road rises again slightly as you reach the second batch of huts and the houses, but every extra push with the legs was doubled in power by the rushing wind. The feeling of high speed, magnified by the dark, made progress appear near-effortless. And so it continued all the way along Cooden Drive, as I made good time, if not my best to the lights, then a short rest before returning with Peter Buss to Normans Bay.

We rode into the wind and tried to have a conversation. This was hindered by Peter's increasing deafness and by the wind, which ripped my words apart before they could reach his cloth-ears. I had to repeat everything I said, at ever-increasing volume, at least three times. He will no doubt claim that he was pretending not to hear me in order to provoke me, but I know that he is more than a little 'mutt'. It would try the patience of a saint, it really would. Why oh why doesn't he get a hearing aid? Pride, I guess. Vanity - huh! I dunno, mutter, mutter... Anyhow, we resorted to exchanging insults and name calling - neither of us had a problem hearing then!

Mini bike review
As you might have gathered, I've taken the plunge and bought a winter / bad weather bike. I guess we all live with the pressure of 'n+1', where n = the number of bikes we currently have, and '1' equals the perceived need for another. I justify my purchase on the basis of not messing up my 'best' bike anymore than it is already, having ridden it in all weathers and for two winters. The bottom bracket needs changing, as do all the cables and the derailleurs. The paint on the seat tube is scabby and flaky, but it is a light bike for one with an aluminium frame at under 8kg with the stock wheels (the Giant PSL-1s mentioned above). It needs a rebuild.

Cannondale CAADX gets The Thumbs Up From Neil!

The new beast is a rather more manly, butch and thumpingly-chunky 10.3kg. As already described, nearly 4 kg of that is in the wheels and tyres. They ride beautifully over bad surfaces and, downhill at least, are no slower than any other wheels. Riding uphill is more of a challenge, but it's not as bad as you might think, even with 'just' a nine-speed Sora cassette. The stock wheels and tyres will be pressed into service on winter BBRs rides, where the extra grip and cushioning will be handy across the Rickney Marshes. The chain set is 46-36, but that big ring is still good for 60kph with the 11 tooth at the back. I'm really struck by how over-geared my better bike is, with a 53-39 and 12-28 set-up. It's early days, but I'm interested to see whether the tighter, lower gearing will get fuller use than the higher and wider set-up. However, the gear change is not as slick as the Ultegra on the 'best' rig - everything happens quite slowly, but the changes are positive.

Changing the wheels over has taken a good amount of weight off. I guess I could make more savings by changing the seatpost, saddle, bars and stem, and I might next year. The frame is worth it - I don't know the weight, but the ride it gives is superb, a real pleasure to go out on. It will take mudguards AND - get this - it has sparkly black paint. How many of you can say the same, eh? Yeah, thought so. Oh, just remembered that I think Barney has a sparkly orange bike - damn, foiled again, just let me win, just once, with sparkles (walks away whimpering...).


Regards, Neil

15/11 ESCA Reliability Trial

It was time for the annual ESCA reliability trail.We managed to field a team of eight riders which isn't too bad historically but our contribution rather pails into insignificance when measured against  clubs such as Eastbourne Rovers who managed an impressive 38 entrants!

Quick Last Minute Adjustment For Shirley's Steed!

We had three different ability groups. First time reliability riders Shirley and Justin were in the 4 hour group, myself Tom and Malc C were in the 3.5 hour group, while Patrick Gareth and Malc D were in the 3 hour group.

Justin And Shirley Set Off On Their First Reliability trial!

After waving goodbye to Shirley and Justin my group had a thirty minute wait before it was time for the 3.5 hour riders to set off . There was quite a large group waiting for the off but for some strange reason the timekeeper set us off first and said that we were late? This meant that for the first eight miles or so we saw no other riders. Riding down a very long straight road called the 'Broyle Side' I wandered if it was going to be like this all the way round? The only exciting thing that happened was when Malc C broke a spoke which we had to bend around another spoke to stop it flapping about.

Riding through Ringmer myself and Tom got  a little ahead of Malc C and slowed down for him to catch up. Somehow Tom managed to do a low speed tumble while still attached (Shirley style) to his pedals. Tom's amusement at this was cut short when I looked up to see a massive group of mainly 'Lewes Wanders'  approaching at speed. Shouting a warning to Tom I hastily set off worried that I would be caught up in a clash of alloy and carbon. For the next half hour we managed to stay with this large group enjoying the slipstream effect of so many riders, only for them to pull away from us on some unnamed hill.

After an unpromising start the route was becoming really enjoyable. The organisers had managed to plot a route without 'shitty little lanes' and there were plenty of moderate hills. Malc C was suffering a bit today and thought it was really hilly but riding in my favourite ( mild winter) conditions I was finding it pretty easy.

The 3.5 Hour Group At Checkpoint Two!

Somewhere up ahead were Shirley and Justin. Shirley is not fast but she does have tremendous endurance and like me was finding the route easy. Justin has never ridden further than BBR before and so started to suffer with painful legs after thirty miles but with Shirley's encouragement managed to keep going ( they must have been going quite well as we failed to catch them up )

There were three check points on route but thankfully none of those annoying questions that some organisers make you answer. On the last one we were just getting our cards stamped when the familiar figures of Gareth, Malc C and Patrick arrived. They had caught us up having put in an impressive pace that Patrick said he had had difficulty maintaining. Also there was the mercurial figure of steve D. Steve seems to make a habit of appearing out of nowhere on many of these types of rides.

All that was left was an easy mainly downhill descent for 7 miles.Ourselves and lots of riders from various clubs cruised along at a gentle pace towards East Hoathley . Lulled into a semi comatose decent by the gentle whirr of a dozen or so chains and wheels, I suddenly realised there were only five minutes left and we still had over 1.5 miles to do and the last bit was on a bit of a climb. Determined not to miss out on being reliable; myself, Tom and Malc C had to make one more big effort and arrived at the finish with less than two minutes to spare. The fast group had to hold back for a while before they also crossed the finish in a reliable time. Shirley and Justin had also met their 4 hour time so HSLCC may not have had a large turnout but at least the club are 100% reliable. 

Celebrating Our 100% reliability Ride At 'The Kings Head'!

Steve C

13/11 Friday Night Ride- 'Bunny Hop'

Duncan Is Getting In Good Shape For Majorca!

Good clear weather and use of Facebook brought out a solid number of eight riders for the Friday night ride.This included Duncan who had seen the posting on Facebook and decided to come out despite having already ridden back from Brighton that afternoon. He declared the extra climbing  would be good training for Pete Baker's Majorca trip .

I am now in the habit of setting off a little earlier than the others so that I can safely get down Battery hill at my own pace without holding anyone up. This time I left two minutes early rather than one. This worked out perfectly as I had an enjoyable steady decent and the others didn't catch me up until we were near to the entry for the reserve.

Ultra rider Stu Hodd was in a chatty mood and rode with me some way back from the others through the reserve.  Despite now being a cat 2 rider Stu said he was happy just to do a steady ride as his body was completely knackered having finally reached the 40 points needed for qualification. Next year may be a bit easier for him as he only needs 25 points to maintain this status. Unbeknown to myself and Stu a little drama was unfolding up ahead. A rabbit darted across directly into Nathan's path, there was no time to react and Nathan hit it straight on, causing the rabbit to spin up in the air and land directly under Dan's back wheel! Riders and bike emerged unscathed from this incident but the rabbit would not have been so lucky (poor thing!)

The long drag up to Broad-Oak felt particularly  hard and long  but at least this time I had a companion,as Mark was riding his heavy disc equipped Whyte Suffolk which slowed him down considerably.

Reaching the junction we were greeted with a road closed sign and a works van stopping vehicles entering Brede hill. Stu persuaded the friendly van driver to let us through and we enjoyed an almost traffic free journey all the way to Stonestile. An enjoyable nights ride and some fast sections that helped Michael Maxwell gain a Strava PB for the whole route.

Steve C

Part Deux - Wednesday Chain Gang 'We'll all be talking Chinese one day'

10:27 P.M  - Normans Bay

"Are you coming to bed now, darling?", asked a tired Vicki

"Won't be long bunny, I'll just finish this email", I replied

"Who on earth are you emailing at this time of night?"

"Xi Jinping",

"Who?",

"Xi Jinping; he's president of The People's Republic of China"

Vicki, now too tired to react.

"Well do hurry up your cocoas getting cold"

"No, don't worry, I shan't be long"

I surveyed my handiwork:

Dear Sir/President Jinping,

(not a bad start I thought, very respectful)

It is with much interest that I have been following, on the news, your recent state visit to the U.K. where you hope to forge closer trade links with both countries.

My purpose for writing to you is to enquire if you would also be interested in improving trade with my country: The People's RepubIic of Normans Bay (PRNB.)  Although you are a country of 1.357 billion people and we are merely 70 residents, I do feel we have much to offer - Normans Bay is very rich in mineral deposits!.  However, before we can even consider trade links I do feel you need to resolve your quality control issue.  Take for example, my Cree 5000 lm, front cycle lamp which I purchased from a well know auction site.  I chose this item in preference to German or Swedish offerings because I had every confidence in the quality of the Chinese products and the fact that it was only a quarter of the price had no bearing on my decision.   I am quite disappointed, then that this item, which cost me in excess of £12,  has only lasted two years.  I admit that I have used it in all weathers for commuting as well as recreational cycling, but do not feel it has the longevity I would of expected.

I wish to add that I am very much a fan of things Chinesy; in fact I would say that prawn balls with special fried rice and egg foo yung is one of my all time favourite dishes.

With much respect

Mr Peter Buss
People's Republic of Normans Bay

Not bad at all - I shall 'fire it off' in the morning.  Bay

06:45 P.M - Normans

As I was leaving for the Chain Gang my front light went off!.

"Oh, b@ll@cks!""

Good Turn Out Despite The Wind!

I tried thwacking it with my gloves - Gestapo style, but not a flicker from the b*stard (the three green lights were still illuminated so I knew it wasn't the battery pack).

"Oh, scrotums!"

'Click', 'Clack', I made my way up the garden path and back to the house. 'Clip', 'Clop' I went over the walnut flooring in the hallway - luckily Vicki was engrossed on the computer (probably doing cushion research for our new french pad) otherwise I would have definitely got 'one in the ear' for wearing cleats indoors but she seemed unaware as I reached into the desk drawer and got my newly acquired 'Moon' ebay specials.  I switched them on, attached them to the bars and set off for Bexhill.  It was only when I reached the darkness of Sluice Lane that I became aware that the output was woefully inadequate.  I went to adjust them from level one to three when I realised I had them on upside down, I tried to press the button but with gloved hands I would have had more chance of rolling a 'fag'.  Stubbornly I pressed on, blind as a bat but without the sonar guidance. I was also frightened to put them on full beam as I was concerned that I would use up all the 'juice' and be totally without lights before the end of the evening.  I nearly ended up in a heap when I took the wrong turn just past the Star; although there appears to be only one choice , the other option is into the short drive of the mobile home that sits on the corner (look out for it next time you are passing), I wavered put stayed upright. The relief of reaching  the lamp lights of Cooden drive was so great that although I am not a religious man I found myself doing the classic cross of the hand associated with the Catholic Church: spectacles - testicles - wallet - watch.

Rare Appearance From Steve B On His Fixie

As Neil has pointed out in his blog, there was a great turnout despite the nasty windy conditions.  By the time I reached the short incline of South Cliff I was at the back apart from Steve C and Steve D.  The latter Steve whizzed past me with a cheery:

"What, you cream crackered?"

"No, I'm just ****ed", I replied

Although I would never describe myself as a great cyclist, I do have my moments; but not tonight I was struggling.

Part way along Herbrand, just as I was about to curse 'these p*xy lights', Steve went past and said:

"You can see what what you're doing now!"

Oh, the relief!.

"I can't go on the front, Steve, I can't see jack sh*t"

"Oh, don't worry, we can just use my light"

This reminded me of the line in the 'Two Little Boys' Song' - by the man we no longer talk about:

"There's room on my horse for two"

So feeling no pain I sat on Steve's wheel all the way to the roundabout.

On the way back I again found myself relying on Steve's light.  Quite frankly I 'sucked him dry' (I think I may have found a better expression than that) all way to the lights of Cooden Drive, when I spotted Steve D just ahead of us.

"Thanks for the tow Steve, but let's get Denny!"

Quite understandably Steve, who had done all the work thus far, wasn't able to follow, whereas I  was now feeling quite rested.  Around about the second 'lump' I passed him with a equally cheery:

"Need a push Steve?"  

Was this childish?, yes!
Was it unnecessary?, yes!
Did it feel good, Oh, yes!

"I've already done this route once today", he said.

"So have I, I go this way to work", I replied; not be outdone.

To be fair he had a big ride earlier including Beachy and was now chilling (I did check his Strava entry and can confirm that he had made a big effort earlier in day whereas I had only done a flat 14 mile commute.)  

'Lets just share the final stretch then?", I offered.

"Certainly, it's not a race after all",

I then made sure I arrived back at the lights just ahead of him!

Steve C arrived shortly afterwards;

"Did you catch him then?"

"Oh, yes" and I felt my chest swell by just a small amount.

As I said last week, there is much drama to be had at the back of the Chain Gang.

Peter Buss

P.S
The 5000 LM Cree lights mentioned earlier are amazing value at £16 and I ordered another one immediately, also, as Neil pointed out, the £7 Moon copies are bright enough to light the road if you put them on the highest setting - again, great value and probably the same as the real Moon lights at a quarter of the price.

Wednesday Chain Gang - Double Dozen in Dazzling Dash!

There was a great turn out last night, with 24 riders ready to bravely face a strong south westerly wind. An earlier trip around Bexhill had prepared me for the wind, but we were all keen to get out for our fast mid-week training session, perhaps thinking more about the wind-assisted return leg than the outward grind. The group was in such good spirits that it was too busy talking to notice the time, until the utterly awesome Stuart Hodd called us to order and rolled out with the ultra-fasts.

Even The 'Awesome' Stuart Hodd Can Suffer A Pre Chain-Gang Puncture

The rest of us waited long enough for the smell of burning rubber to dissipate before riding out after them - heads down and teeth gritted for a tough outward leg in which we would need to work together to reduce the pain. The second group made good headway, despite the wind, with Tom 'Iron Legs' Norris forcing the pace along the sea front, up South Cliff and westward on Cooden Drive. It was more than I could do to keep up and, despite closing the gap by the Cooden Hotel, I was soon dropped to make a solo ride across the marsh, chasing the distant red light of another rider dropped from that group.

The wind was a strong and persistent bully. I made myself as small as I could and welcomed any respite I could find - the bungalows and beach huts on Herbrand; the hedgerows leading to the Star Inn; and the flint walls near Spooky Hill. I span onwards up Spooky Hill, reaching the top and being hit by the wind. I dropped back down to the marsh, before turning west again into the teeth of the gale. Bloody Hell.

A big crowd of riders was waiting at the roundabout for me and the other stragglers, chatting and drinking before starting the return journey. Peter Buss and Steve C came into view and the ultras took this as their cue to head back to Bexhill. Right... here we go again, but at least the wind would be with me, a friend now and not a foe.

The faster riders split away near Spooky Hill and I fell in with a small group that I did not immediately recognise. Greatly relieved to have the wind at my back, I rode up the west slope at a decent lick, only to become aware of a ticking-clicking noise growing stronger on my right side. Could it be..? Yes, the flat-back came into the periphery of my vision and I knew that Tom was overtaking me, his dicky bottom-bracket announcing his presence as surely as, well, an announcement. I pressed a bit harder on the pedals, but he got past me, making a 'neeeoooowwwww' noise, such as small boys make when pretending to be racing cars.

It annoyed the hell out of me and, at that moment, I hated him. I shouted that I was 'going to get the little bastard' to Simon G and pelted after him. We reached the flat top of the hill and I waited a moment so that I would have the momentum of the downward east slope before riding past him, leaning into his ear and shouting 'NEEEOOOOWWWWW!!!!'. It felt GOOD! Ha! Tom made a range of noises designed to put me off my pedal stroke, but I ignored him (I know his tricks of old) and kept pushing on, my temper subsiding as quickly as it had flared up.

Great Performance From Newbie Jamie On Only His Second Chain-gang

Tom passed me again and I realised we were now playing the 'neeeoooowwwww' game in earnest, as he again made that ridiculous sound. F***, I'm not having that... So, I passed him again and, yes, made a short, sharp 'neeooowwww' sound as we neared the level crossing. On we rode, alternating the lead in our petty but strangely rewarding duel, with Simon G hanging on as we rode fast along Herbrand. On one pass, I was too out of breath and on the edge of laughter to make the noise - Tom complimented me on my restraint.

I led as we reached the turn onto Cooden Drive, the three of us jockeyed for position as we hit the short climb up from the hotel. I went wide to keep my speed up, but went too far out to avoid the drain cover. Simon pulled ahead with Tom behind him, so I rode to his right to box him in, but he slipped out and made a gap of 20 metres or so as we reached the top. 'Let's get him!' I shouted to Simon, my arch-nemesis from last year, but now my ally against the evil Bianchi Bomber. Tom was riding strongly and we had to work hard for the length of Cooden Drive to catch him, but catch him we did, slapping him on the back of the head as we went by. For good measure, I also eased past Simon. Ridiculous, but fun, and good to feel like I'd worked really hard.

With the drama of the ride behind us Tom, Peter and I rode back to Cooden. Peter had no front light, his tarmac-melting headlamps having packed up after 18 months of near-daily use. He now has just the  'Ebay Special' Moon copies from China, but they are very good actually, although they shine brightly rather than throwing light forward. They are small and cheap enough to buy two, having one in your pocket as a back-up. Bargain.

We paused at the border with Normans Bay, the searchlight sweeping no-man's land and the guards shouting insults in their strange, guttural tongue. We ignored them and admired Tom's new rear light - no more zip-ties, shock! It looks very neat, one of those 'shield' lights, from memory. Peter explained that Steve 'Gadget' Ferguson was not out because he had some electrical problems and did we know a decent electrician who could help him? I suggested that Steve had probably overloaded his RCD board with an inverted power surge, plugging in all his lights, cameras, bike computers and bar-end indicators at the same time. Peter and Tom nodded in sage agreement.

We then listened at length to Peter's complicated pre-BBR and BBR arrangements, and how one was on a Sunday and not a Saturday, the 'special' to Brighton, but that was a one-off, not setting a precedent, and.... I was woken by Tom saying we should head off now as it was starting to get light.

We rode a two-man chain to the roundabout into a strengthening wind and talked about (whispers...) new bikes. Gulp. We are both thinking about something for the winter, perhaps with disc brakes and a loud paint job, perhaps able to take mudguards, perhaps also made from some alien-technology material that makes a frame weighing less than a pound. Then I remembered that there are already frames that weight not much more than that. Just amazing, when you think about it - the weight of half a bag of sugar and capable of bearing a bloke of 14 stone travelling at 50mph down a bumpy hill. Actually, when I consider that I think I might like a frame with a bit more beef to it!

Neil

November 7- Saturday's Bacon Butty Ride (BBR)

Nine intrepid riders assembled at Di Paulos between 9:30 and 10:00, enthusiastically tucking into coffee and cake, and rather less enthusiastically getting their act together for what they expected to be a wet ride. Chris Parker, club secretary, gave a few of the more reluctant folk some encouragement and we eventually rolled out at about 10:10. But hey, who is keeping score here - we do this for fun!

Our merry band had two junior riders (Theo and Fabien) and a returning Ollie (young adult..?), back from a year off the bike. I think he could have picked a better day for his first road ride, but at this time of year dry days become increasingly rare. Last week's BBR also saw a good number of younger riders, something we really welcome. It was great also to see Shirley, late of her epic Lands End to John O'Groats adventure, braving the elements with some style - chapeau Shirley! The ride is a great opportunity to ride with experienced cyclists over a mix of road conditions and weather, perhaps testing yourself against some of the faster riders or going at a pace of your choosing.

Malc D was looking lean and mean on his fixie as he led a breakaway group of Theo, Ollie and me  into a fairly strong headwind, along the sea front to Cooden. Turning north at the Cooden Beach Hotel brought the wind to our backs. We surfed the breeze past the golf club and through the more exclusive back roads of Little Common and . From there, we headed north west-ish to the ancient woodlands of High Woods, then up-hill and down-dale to Hooe Common. The group was splitting and reforming according to speed, the head-on south-westerly wind sorting us according to strength and stamina.

Having sprinted up Peter Buss Hill, we pressed on down Kiln Lane, taking extra care in the more challenging surface conditions this lane presents, before hopping over to the Horsebridge lane to Jacob's Ladder (the steep climb into Wartling). This is preceded by a technical descent that demands concentration and good handling skills to avoid potholes, a loose surface and overhanging plants. The group gave each other space and respected the risks this presents, before busting our lungs up the short, steep climb to The Lamb Inn's car park. Malc D proved strong out of the saddle, closely followed by Theo, who nipped by me as I lost traction on a patch of wet leaves, such is my awesome power (yeah right Neil).

Malc D employed Theo's young eyes to help him spot the puncture he picked up on the ascent, before Chris P said 'meet you at the cafe', giving the faster riders licence to ride at a higher pace. We set off with Theo and Ollie close behind us, turning at The Bull (not all the navigation points are pubs, dear reader) and heading towards Herstmonceux and the turn towards the church. This busier road is at least wide enough to allow traffic to pass safely but we were soon back on lanes bordered by reeds and ditches, bent low into an increasingly strong wind. A squall of rain barrelled over us, the water at least clean, if cold, but it was a short-lived shower.

The section of the ride that heads south from near Cricketers Lane to the junction near Rickney Farm is one of my favourite stretches. In summer, the landscape is as beautifully striking as it is simple - tall brown and green reeds, blue sky, green fields and mirror-smooth waterways reflecting the blueness back to the sun. In winter, the beauty is a more acquired taste - the sky often a boiling mass of grey cloud, the reeds shorter, bent-over red and gold, the surface of the ditches chased this way and that. The narrow lane demands close attention - its surface is scarred by heavy farm trailers and bad weather - but it is always rewarding. Sharp bends, snappy slopes and short straights make this a linear crit race. The wind was smack in my face today, making it a hard slog as I tried to hang on to Malc D's wheel, with Theo and Ollie close behind me.

The turn eastwards towards Chilley Farm provided a welcome respite from that intense session, the wind again pushing us along at a good pace as it rippled through the reeds and hedgerows to our left and right. The verges were free this week of Range Rovers and horse boxes, the hunt having a week off, or perhaps chasing a scent somewhere else in the county. We turned into Chilley Farm for more coffee and for bacon butties, egg baps, sausage rolls, flapjacks, cans of coke, a box of fudge and a cheese scone. Had we really consumed so many calories in the ride from Di Paulos that we needed this amount of food to make it home? I'm not sure we did, but as well as the ride providing a great chance for fresh air, it provides a chance to enjoy the treats that (I presume...) most of use sacrifice during the week. Well, maybe!

Look What The BBR Has Done To Neil's Lovely Shiny TCR!

Mal C, Steve 'Gadget' Ferguson and I set off back to Bexhill before the others as we were getting cold, enjoying an 15km wind-assisted blast home to hot showers and, er, more food. We'd certainly earned the fast return, having slogged hard on the outward leg, and I guess we may have deserved more tuck once we were clean and dry.

'Angels With Dirty Faces'....Well Gadget And Malc Anyway!

The more regular BBR riders will know that those strong in the leg and thick in the head do a ride before the BBR (the 'Pre-BBR'), either to Beachy Head, or (as today) a flatter route around the lanes. The pace is faster and the ride generally more demanding than the BBR, typically 50km in length (that's 30 miles in old money), arriving at Di Paulos for well-earned refreshment at 9:30. Given the forecast for this morning, you could be forgiven for thinking that the pre-BBR would be cancelled, but no-siree - Mal C, Steve F and I all made it to the Normans Bay starting point at 7:45. Mal talked Steve and I out of doing Beachy Head today as he feared the wind would be an undue hindrance on the long drag to the start of Dukes Drive (the start of the Beachy Head climb-proper). We gave in reluctantly, keen not to make the poor chap suffer too much.

Our Intrepid Author Remains Fresh Faced!

The flatter route takes in more marshy lanes and, as a result, a lot of mucky standing water. The rain mostly held-off and the wind was tolerable, but for the riders behind my mudguard-less bike, the result was a rather amusing speckled effect that covered faces and clothes in neat brown spots. Steve seemed to come off the worst, riding behind both Mal and me. Our backsides were also heavily covered in mud, our lower halves wet-through and our bikes looked a right state. Surely proof - if indeed proof were needed - that each of us needs a titanium winter bike capable of taking mudguards. 'Yes!' I hear you chorus - you will be quoted in my negotiations on this point...

 As ever, the tough outward leg into the headwind was rewarded with a firm push by the wind, all the way from Pevensey to Bexhill. Up to a point, the only limit on our speed was how fast we could spin our little hairy legs -we felt bionic. Well, semi-bionic with some bits falling off. I waved them off at Galley Hill as they returned to St Leonards, dripping as they pedalled and covered in wet, slimy mud. Ah, so many bikes to ride on so many roads and not nearly enough time. Best keep at it then.


Regards, Neil